Hemispheres Magazine

RULE NO. 6: TAKE DETOURS

All good road trips feature a few unpredictable moments, and the best way to go about finding these is by turning off onto a dirt road every so often. You might come across a quaint old farmhouse, or a field of fragrant wildflowers, or a local willing to brief you on the intricacies of lobster trapping — the point is, you never know.

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RULE NO. 7: WEATHER IT

If you’re in a convertible, your first response to rain will be to shout, “The roof! The roof!” After the initial excitement dies down, you’ll spend a contented hour being mesmerized by the rhythmic back-and-forth of the wipers. When this gets old, linger over a cup of coffee in a roadside diner, or loiter for a while in someplace like the Musical Wonder House, a Maine museum devoted to antique music boxes.

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RULE NO. 8: PROP UP A LOCAL BAR

Before turning in for the night, find the place where the townsfolk go to unwind. Order a local brew, or something that allows you to use the word “neat.” Don’t be intimidated. Talk to people. Ask questions. Tell jokes. You can do all of these things at Novare Res Bier Café, hidden down an alley in Portland — provided you’re not paralyzed by the menu of 525-plus beers.

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RULE NO. 9: BRING CASH

No matter how much it may seem like an appropriate substitute for a couple of bucks, you should never try to tip a gas station attendant with beef jerky. Similarly, do not attempt to buy a stick of jerky with a credit card. In fact, unless you have some hard currency on your person, stay away from all heavily cured meat products.

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